TTT with a 1 year old

I had arthroscopic surgery to supposedly fix a torn meniscus in October 2009 (9 months ago). He said that I wouldn't need crutches and would be walking around 4 days later. I had to have crutches for 3 weeks. The more people I talked to I couldn't find a single person who had a problem with it. I finally went back in February, he gave me a cortisone shot and sent me on my way, but told me I never had a torn meniscus it was due to plica which they shaved down. Apparently I am allergic to the shot, because for 4 days every lymph node in my body swelled. Anyway, I've been doing PT all along at home, the more I do the more painful it gets.

I finally went back yesterday and was given 2 options: either do PT for 6 weeks, or have a TTT. (I have prominent knee caps and have dislocated twice already, I'm only 23) I went ahead and set up the surgery for August 13th and I'm weighing the options. He said that I could go back to work after 7-10 days (I'm going to take off 2 weeks), then brace for 6 weeks, full ROM around 3-4 months, oh and no crutches needed. From what I've read here that's not the case. It's on my right knee so I'm not sure what I'm going to do as far as driving. Also I have a 13 month old son. I have no idea what I'm going to do. With the first surgery my son was only 3 months old so he wasn't moving, but now he is running and getting into everything and finds it hilarious to bang on things. How am I supposed to be able to take care of him, even with help? I can't be on crutches for 1-2 months, even if someone comes and stays with me at night untiil DH gets off work (8:30).

I'm so nervous. I can't keep having surgeries: I can't take off work for weeks at a time, I have to take care of my son, I can't spend $1500 a year on surgeries (that's my stop-loss). I just want it to be done and over with so I can recover one final time. I'm scared about it not fixing the problem and having to live with this pain forever. It affects every aspect of my life, every movement I make.